Back to School

It's August...the month of new beginnings for so many people...so many kids...so many of our friends.  It's the month that school starts and routine is once-again achieved (woot!).  It's been a long and crazy and emotional summer at our house and we are happy to start school again.  Once again, we are homeschooling this year and I'm blessed to be able to provide this for my kids.  This makes our 11th year homeschooling (I think?)...we've been doing it since PadaOne was 3 and he's 14 now.  Crazy to think how much we've done and how far we've come since that time.    This was from Monday, our first day of the new year:

PadaThree is starting Kindergarten this year and she's been SO excited.  Loving to have her own desk, her own school books, her own everything....and especially looking forward to learning to read!

"But," so many say, "why are you trying to be like the public school?  I thought the best part of homeschooling was that you weren't like the public school!"  Yes, this is true...we aren't stuck to a schedule of 8-3, we can stop when we want to for breaks, lunch, snacks, giggles, or vacation.  :)  We don't *have* to use a certain curriculum or report anything (for our state, that's how it is).  We don't have to test yearly (again, in our state this is true).  However, for our family, we choose to do many things just like the public school:  we use textbooks, we test annually, we have desks, and we follow a pretty standard school day (especially for PadaOne who started 9th/10th grade this year, so he has about 9 subjects he's working through).

On Facebook, I saw several of my homeschooling friends posting this "Not Back to School" photo idea and encouraging homeschoolers to post pictures on a certain day (next week, I think?) of their kids doing something "non-school" or something fun on the day that the rest of the kids in their area are going back to school.  I struggle with this.  The idea (from what I've read) is to help our kids not "feel bad" that they aren't getting the new backpacks, lunch boxes, and all new things that most public school kids get.  The idea continues with, "Instead of you getting to go back to school like the other kids, we'll go out to eat breakfast and post pictures everywhere and show everyone how we aren't going back to school!"  Yipppeee.  Or not.

See, my problem with this is there is *already* such a great DIVIDE between public school parents/families/children and homeschool parents/families/children....so WHY would we want to add to that by creating more division in their hearts??  This just seems so wrong to me.  It seems very unChristian to me...especially if we are doing this to thumb our noses at our fellow-sisters/brothers who are public schooled.  See, where we worship, we are only 1 of 2 families that homeschool (for the longest time we were the only family, until our new minister's family moved in!), so for the kids at our congregation there just doesn't need to be any more cause for division or rifts or drama.

{Aside from all of that, the excuse that seems to be used (I feel bad for my kids because they don't get the new backpacks/colors/etc like the other kids) just seems flimsy at best.  There are enough school supply sales that if you *really* felt bad for your kiddos you could spend the $1 to buy them a new box of Crayolas!  So it just seems like this is what we're telling ourselves to make ourselves feel better about bragging all over Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter that we're able to homeschool our kids and others aren't (or can't or choose not to).}

Instead, what we've chosen to do this year is to start school at the same time (within a few days) of the rest of the kids in our area and post about how we ARE schooling (because really, isn't that the purpose of me staying home with them and *homeschooling* them!?).  We'll post our Back to School pictures because it is an important part of our lives as well.  Will we have days where we take the morning off and go have breakfast together? Sure, perhaps.  Will we have days where we stop early to watch a movie together as a family?  Maybe.  But that doesn't mean we are any different than anyone else...  We know a family who is taking a WEEK off in a few weeks (from public school) to take the kids to Disney.  Another family I know randomly takes the kids out of school early "just because."  

Basically, it boils down to the old saying I am constantly saying to my kids:  just because something *can* be done doesn't mean it *should* be done.  CAN I take my kids out to breakfast and take pics of them with me and be happy for ourselves?  Absolutely! SHOULD I post it to Instagram/FB with the tag of "NOT Back to School"?  Probably not.  (Especially if you're just going to go home and do school... )

Homeschool Arguments debunked!

I am reposting a Matt Walsh post...I love most everything Matt has posted on his blog and share much of it on my Facebook page.  However, being homeschoolers, I thought his rebuttal to this letter was truly great.

My favorite quote from the article:
"Expecting your kid to learn ‘social skills’ from public school, is like sending him to live with chimpanzees so that he’ll learn proper table manners."

Here's the article in full:

Behold: the two absolutely worst arguments against homeschooling

Here’s the email I received last week. I was saving it for today, as I’ll be speaking at a homeschool conference tomorrow:

Hi Matt,

I’ve been a pretty decent fan of some of your writings, and while I don’t always agree I find that you sometimes have an entertaining way of presenting your opinion. Anyway, all due respect, I find myself having a hard time continuing to follow you now that I’ve gone back and read through your views on education.

It doesn’t so much bother me that you seem to be PROUD of your lack of a college education. You seem to be of the lucky few smart enough to get away with having no real education to speak of (congratulations). What I can’t reconcile myself with is your vitriol and hatred for public education and your insistence on peddling “homeschooling” like it’s somehow the answers to all of our problems.

I worked in public education for many years so it’s hard for me to stomach your ignorance. However I’ve enjoyed many of your posts so I don’t want to give up on you just yet. Hopefully you’ll consider this email and consider retracting many of your statements about public school. Public school might not be perfect (we can’t all be perfect like you, Matt) but it’s certainly far superior to “homeschool”. Any number of studies prove this. Studies aside, I’d like to see your response to these two point:

1. The flaws in our public school system have to do with PARENTS. Parents send their kids to school and think their job is done, instead of being involved in their child’s education. How can the system ever improve if the involved parents pull out and do their own thing? We have a responsibility not just to our own family but to our community. Homeschool parents hurt their communities when they isolate themselves and remove their children from our academic institutions. If we don’t help the system, the system will not work.

2. You mock the idea of socialization, but the fact is that kids need to learn how to socialize. That skill is not ingrained in them. How can they learn proper social skills if they aren’t around other children? You might as well try to teach your kid how to swim without ever putting him in a pool. It’s most important for kids to learn the academic fundamentals, but learning proper socialization is very important as well. Public school gives young people the chance to become well adjusted adults.

I look forward to your responses to these two points, and to your admission that “homeschool” does far more harm than good to our society. I don’t think I can read your site again until that has happened.

In Christ,
Dan


Hi Dan,

Thanks for reading.

I actually went back to check, and I can’t find the post where I refer to all public school teachers as ‘the devil.’ Now, I can tell you that I had a music teacher in elementary school who once ‘disciplined’ a kid by having him sit in front of the class while she went around the room and asked all of his classmates to insult him. True story. I’m not saying she was ‘the devil,’ but if the devil ever DID teach an elementary school music class, I’m sure he’d do something similar. Let’s just settle on calling her behavior ‘devilish,’ and leave it at that.

But, no, I don’t think all public school teachers are that bad. Some of them are, but not all, and probably not most. In my own experience, I’d say 10 to 15 percent of my public school instructors were so obnoxiously terrible at their jobs that I often wondered if their classes were elaborate practical jokes, or maybe some kind of strange performance art stunt. On the other side, a good 10 to 15 percent were wonderful, dedicated, tuned-in, engaged, and brilliant. The rest fell somewhere in between the two extremes, as is often the case in any profession. The only difference here is that, in most other (non union) occupations, the obnoxiously terrible ones can and will be fired.

I notice that you have no problem laying the blame on parents (or PARENTS, as you call them), but, apparently, leveling even the slightest criticism at the sainted teachers is akin to accusing them of Satan worship. This strikes me as an awfully unbalanced way of approaching the issue.

Also, I’m anxious to read any number of those any number of studies you mentioned. I’m not sure what subject you taught in public school, but I’m positive you’d have given your students a failing grade if their Works Cited page simply said: “-Any number of studies.”
That’s the thing about claiming to have read “studies” that validate your argument about public education being superior to home education — you really have to offer, like, maybe ONE example.

I’m not sure which studies you’ve researched, but I guess it isn’t the one confirming that homeschoolers outperform public schooled kids on standardized tests, or the one showing that homeschooled kids are more prepared for college, or the one showing homeschoolers achieving a higher 4th year GPA.

Really, though, we could go back and forth with studies all day (well, I could — still waiting to see you produce one on your end). What’s the point? This is part of the reason many people are thoroughly disgusted with the way we treat education in our country. We don’t need to be studying our kids like lab rats, running academic experiments on them, and then comparing and contrasting their performance with the other kids across town, and the kids across the world, and the kangaroos in the zoo. Education is not a competitive sport. I’m a little tired of this “quick — learn more stuff faster!” attitude. Education is a much deeper pursuit. It can’t always be quantified and qualified and whateverified. You can’t necessarily measure a person’s knowledge, anymore than you can measure their artistic talent or their sense of humor.

Maybe we should stop turning our kids into charts and bar graphs, and instead work on connecting with them as human beings.

Furthermore, if we treat education like a race (“Race to the Top!”), we only reinforce the notion that the whole endeavor is just a game to see who can absorb the most information, and carry it all across the finish line without having a nervous breakdown.

There is no finish line. Education is a lifelong journey, despite the fact that nowadays we tend to say: “Hey, you graduated college! You’re done! Now go watch Netflix until your eyes bleed!”

So let’s forget the studies and move to your two points:

1) You say we should keep our kids in public school in order to help ‘the system.’
Dan, listen, I have to be real with you: this isn’t just a bad argument — it’s disturbing.
‘Help the system.’

Is this really a priority for parents? When my wife and I make a decision for our family, should we stop first and ask, “wait, but will this help the system?”

Would you REALLY put the welfare of ‘the system’ over that of your own children?

I’d hope that you wouldn’t, and I’d hope that this line of logic is unique to you, but I know that it isn’t. I’ve heard it before. I’ve heard it so often, in fact, that I’m starting to think I’m the strange one for having absolutely no desire to make my children martyrs for some bureaucratic machine.

You know what my kids need me to be? A parent. Their dad. Not a cog in the system, not a member of the community, not a loyal townsperson in the village, not a ‘team player.’

Sure, I’ll tell them not to litter and I’ll make sure they play nice with the other kids in the neighborhood, but when it comes to making choices about something as serious as their education, I don’t frankly care how our decision effects the community. Does that make me callous? I don’t know. I think it just makes me a man with priorities.

Would the school system be helped if my family ‘participated’ in it? Maybe, and I’m sure the circus would be helped if you went on stage and stuck your head in a lion’s mouth. But you won’t sacrifice your scalp to the Ringling Brothers, and I won’t sacrifice my kids’ brains to public school. I guess we’re even.

2) You say that homeschooled kids aren’t properly socialized.

I give you this: with the exception of about 14 thousand other times, this is the first time I’ve ever heard this argument.

It’s an argument that seems to march on, even after its been disproven, discredited, deconstructed, and decapitated. I just promised to stop tossing around studies, so I won’t link to an article (here) that cites at least two different studies proving your assertion to be a myth.

I’ll only say that you chose a pretty strange analogy to prove your point. You can’t teach a child to swim without bringing him to a pool? I agree. But do you bring a child to the pool, drop him there with a thousand other kids, then come back 6 hours later, and repeat that process every day, five days a week, for the next 12 to 13 years? Or do you bring him to the pool, hang out with him, maybe even get in the water and play some Marco Polo, and then leave with him after a couple of hours?

I can tell you this: if you decide to just abandon your kid at the pool for hours and hours and hours on end, every day, for over a decade, he probably won’t do a lot of swimming. If he doesn’t drown (drowning is a very real possibility, especially if there’s only one lifeguard for every 40 kids), he’ll likely spend more time playing on his iPhone and smoking pot in the bathroom than learning the backstroke.

Indeed, when it comes to teaching your kid any other skill — whether its swimming, or driving, or riding a bike, or catching a baseball — all parents understand that their hands-on involvement is crucial. It’s only with the skill of ‘socializing’ where many of us suddenly decide that the matter should be outsourced to a factory in China (or a factory down the street, in this case).

Why do I even need to debunk the socialization claim? You’ve seen our society, haven’t you? You’ve interacted with people, right? Homeschooling might be increasingly popular, but the vast majority of the people you meet have been public schooled. And you’re telling me that the vast majority of the people you meet are ‘socially well adjusted’?

Really?

You and I both know that’s a lie. Sure, you can probably tell me about a homeschooled kid you met once who was totally weird and awkward and stuff, but I could see your anecdote and raise you school shooters, the bullying epidemic, youth suicide rates, a youth culture utterly dominated by cliques, fads, and trends, and then this:



Well adjusted adults?

WELL ADJUSTED ADULTS?

Go to a college campus — any college campus — and tell me again how these public schooled ladies and gentlemen are such well adjusted adults.

For God’s sake, Dan, they literally cannot socialize without inhaling a barrel of urine-flavored light beer ahead of time.

Public schools teach our kids how to socialize? Then why is this such a common sight:



I’m not claiming that homeschoolers don’t use smart phones or beer bongs, but I am saying that an overwhelming preponderance of our society has been exclusively public schooled, and if public school helped ‘socialize’ us, you’d think we’d see SOME positive results SOMEWHERE.

Expecting your kid to learn ‘social skills’ from public school, is like sending him to live with chimpanzees so that he’ll learn proper table manners.

‘Socialization’ — in the public school context — means that your child will simply absorb behavioral cues from her peers. She learns to socialize by aping her friends, who are themselves only copying other girls. She learns to repress the parts of her that don’t fit in, and put on an exterior designed to help her fade into the collective. I’m not theorizing here, this IS the social process in public school.

It’s also competitive; your social status depends on your ability to cut your peers down, until your can easily step on them and elevate yourself.

Expressing your ideas, showing vulnerability, communicating your deepest thoughts and feelings — these are all fervently discouraged. Kids are tasked with expressing not their own thoughts, but sufficiently imitating the thoughts and views of the peer collective. Children who can’t keep up, or who have no desire to keep up, will either have to be the most self-assured human beings on the planet (which is unlikely, since they haven’t been given the tools to develop that self-assurance), or they’ll become bitter, self-conscious, and depressed.

There is nothing positive about any of this. Nobody is better for it. Nobody benefits. The psychological damage can be lasting, maybe even permanent. Again, this is not my theory. This is just the way it works. How could you be so oblivious, Dan?

Now, homeschool socialization is different. Here, a child learns his social skills from his parents. He is oriented by adults, not other children. He matures, and grows, and is provided a safe environment to, as the phrase goes, be himself. Despite common perception, I don’t think most homeschool kids are locked in a tower like Rapunzel, and forbidden from human contact. They have friends, they play sports, they emerge into society and interact with people.

The only difference is how they learn to interact. The public school kid learns to interact based on how his peers carry on in the hallways and at the lunch table, whereas the homeschool kids learns to interact based on the guidance of his parents.

Who has a better foundation for becoming a well adjusted adult?

I’m not insinuating that homeschool is perfect, or that homeschool students are perfectly adjusted, but I am absolutely declaring that ‘socialization’ is the WORST part of public school.

Find a different selling point, Dan.

I appreciate the email.

In Christ (whose Word, incidentally, exhorts us to “train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it”),

Matt
*******

Monthly and Weekly Meal Planning

Recently, I decided to get back into a habit I had several years ago partly because it was so much better for my budget but also partly out of desperation.  I was soooo tired of hearing the question, "Mom, what's for breakfast?"  or "Mom, what's for lunch?"  I figured the best way to get them to stop asking me what they could eat was to provide a list of items for them to choose from.   Originally, the plan was they had a list of 5 items each week to choose from for breakfast and 5 items for lunch.  Once they chose an item for that week, it was no longer an option and they had to choose from the remaining items on the list.  That worked at first, but then one would choose sandwiches when the other chose frozen burritos and they'd forget, lose track, or lament their own choice.  It became a burden with PadaThree because she wanted what BOTH of what the boys had and then she wouldn't eat half of either item.  Clearly, this was NOT working.  So while I was coming up with a monthly meal plan, I decided to implement breakfast and lunch in there as well and provide the whole family with meal lists.  We are week 5 and so far, this is working beautifully! 

{I got into a conversation with a friend on Facebook about getting new ideas for meals and creating a list and I promised her a more detailed description of how I do this and how I rearrange my month (or week) when activities pop up.  So, this is it!}

First, I started by listing out all of our favorite meals...including the standard go-to meals I always fix (and that we're getting sick of), the Pinterest recipes I wanted to try, the once-in-a-while favorites that we enjoy but I forget to make, etc.  When making this list, I didn't stop until I had more than 30 meals listed so that unless we wanted to we would never have to have a repeat meal in any given month.  Then I got out my 3x5 cards (and to make it fun, I used the colored ones I've been saving...) and I put one meal on each card.  You can see there are a couple of aspects to each card:

~~The name of the meal is at the top left, followed by the list of ingredients required for that meal.  This is typically *not* a recipe for me because I so rarely follow recipes.  However, there are a few cards in there (my Pinterest ones) that actually have a recipe on it.  I cook mainly using methods rather than recipes so I list out whatever is needed to make the particular dish.
  
~~To the right of the title is a capital letter.  "S" is for Stovetop, "C" is for Crockpot, "O" is for Oven.  This mainly helps me in the next phase of my monthly plan so that I can quickly pull out all the "C" cards for the days I know I'm going to need a Crockpot meal and choose easily from those cards.  {Thinking about this after-the-fact, I realize it might have made sense to use the color of the card to indicate which style of cooking is required for that meal and then I could pull based on color.  If you choose to do this method of meal-planning, that might be the way you do it!}

~~In the bottom-right of the card (and in a different color of ink) I list out the standard side dishes we like to have with that particular meal.  So with spaghetti or lasagna, I always have garlic bread, but also have salad, corn, etc...because what I choose to go with that main dish will be determined each week by my schedule.  (You'll see how this comes together in a bit.)

~~The binder clip on the top stack of cards is the current month's meal stack so that each week when I make the plan for the family, I just pull from the clipped stack and leave the others alone.

~~On the Pinterest recipes that are new to us...I particularly like having the 3x5 cards for this because if we hate the recipe I can toss the card.  But if it's one that needs changing or one that we think would be better with xyz spice, I just make a notation on that card for the next time I make it.  Then when I plan that meal, I adjust accordingly.  Once we have a meal/dish to revamped to our liking, I just write out a new card with the list of ingredients needed for how we like it.


Next, I printed out a standard calendar for the month.  Blank.  Black and white.  I didn't need anything too fancy.  (I chose to print out a year in advance, but you wouldn't have to.)  I sat down with all of my cards, my family's activity calendar, and a pencil and started filling in the days that I knew we would be home for an evening meal.  I do this in pencil because I often change my mind mid-plan and rearrange the days.  I try to alternate beef, pork, and chicken so that we don't get too sick of any one meat through the week.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  {sorry for the shadow on the pictures....}

~~Based on our schedule (that I know ahead of time) I plan out the month.  On the days that we need a faster meal, I put one in place that is either a one-pot-wonder or a meal that comes together quickly for me.  Above, we had an evening that was a Bible study so I put Stroganoff in that spot because I can throw that one together in about 30 minutes.  Easy to do after a long day of homeschooling!

~~Notice in the first week there's an arrow that switches Tuesday and Wednesday.  This happened because of a last minute activity that was planned and I needed to switch the two meals based on the amount of time I had to prepare the meal.

~~Also, in the first week, there is an item circled (Ham and Beans...YUM!).  That one I circled because we never got to have it that week.  We had enough in leftovers in the first 3 days of the week that we had a Must-Go night (where everything in the fridge "must go!") so I didn't cook that night.  Yay me!  

The next thing I do is print out this weekly meal planner (there are several available online, just find the one you like).  I print this out each month x4 so that I have each week ready to fill in on the weekend.  Incidentally, ALL of these things I have printed out and stored in a folder on my desk so they are all within easy reach.  I love being able to fill this out so that the kids know what they can have for breakfast without asking me and I can spread out their favorite foods throughout the week.  A few months ago I had taken away cereal because they went through it soooo fast (who can just eat ONE bowl of cereal??) and because of the sugar.  However, by doing this method, I get to toss it back into the mix for them to offer a fast breakfast on mornings when we're in a hurry.  Score for mom!  I place this paper on the island in the kitchen or on the fridge (if I can keep it high enough so PadaThree doesn't take it down and disappear with it!) and then everyone can find it.

 

    

 The last step in my weekly/monthly planning is to print out my shopping list.  Now, this list is something I developed on my own when PadaOne was just a baby (and he'll be 13 soon!!  Waaaaa!).  I typed up a list of our "standard" purchases.  Being the OCD person I am...and thinking that shopping needs to be done in a logical, organized fashion in order to save time *and* money...I organized the list into not only the "aisle order" of my local WallyWorld, but also in the order that I shop.  When I walk in, I immediately go to the left (toward the pharmacy) and basically "circle" the store......you know:  pharmacy/beauty, home stuff, toys, electronics, clothing/baby, cleaning products, and then grocery.  Everyone else does this, right?  (Don't answer that!) 

Anyway, this standard list has changed a LOT over the years.  When I started it, we had a little one on formula and in diapers.  We used a different kind of soap...shampoo...deodorant then.  I bought a lot more "convenience" foods and hadn't yet learn to make many of them from scratch.  Plus, in the ever-changing world of marketing, the aisles have changed through the years and I've had to adjust my list accordingly.  I typically only update it once or twice year.

When I print it out, I have it handy (on the island in the kitchen) so that whenever I discover an item that needs to be purchased that week I can either circle it (if it's one of the standards) or write it onto the page in the approximate location of that item in the store.

Now, it all comes together.....

Once a month, I create the monthly meal plan and clip the cards together for that month.  For the new month, I pull meals first from the stack that is not clipped (from the previous month) and fill in as much as I can that way.  Only then do I dip back into the meals we ate the month before.  I don't always have to do choose from the previous month, but sometimes I want to because it's a food we like to have regularly.  (Time needed:  15-ish minutes, depending on how many times I get interrupted by the Padas.)

When I'm at the point that I am ready to plan for the next week and do my shopping (this varies from week to week based on schedule and weather), I take a look at the family schedule for the next week and see if I need to do any tweaking to the meal plan.  If everything is good to go, I copy over the week's meals to the Weekly page and add in breakfast and lunch items that we want to have.  In doing this, I also pull out the cards for that week's dinner meals and make notations of what sides I feel like cooking with that main dish.  (It is all up to me, right? :D)  I add these side dishes onto the Weekly page so the kids know what is going with each meal...again, remember the plan is for them to have the responsibility of checking the calendar and not having to ask repeatedly what we're having.  While I have the cards out, I take inventory of what's needed to make each meal and circle items on the shopping list that I *know* I will need to purchase.  If there are items I'm unsure of, I just use a sticky note to keep track of that.  Once I get this all finished, I check the pantry and make sure I have what I thought I had and adjust the shopping list.   (Time needed:  eh...maybe 30 minutes?  I really don't think it takes me that long now, but it might.)

The last thing to do is go shopping and put it all away.  Thankfully, I have the Padas to help me with this chore!  :)

Now, what happens if, on Tuesday of a week, I get a call and we have to be somewhere at 6 and the meal I had planned will take me longer to prepare than the time allowed for that day?  Easy.  I have a couple of options:

1) Take a look at the meals for the rest of the week and see if there's one I can switch around with this one.  If I've shopped correctly, I should have everything on-hand and this shouldn't be *too* hard to accomplish.

2) If I have the meat thawed out to use that works well in another, easier dish, and I have the ingredients on hand to make it, just switch it out.  I try really hard to have enough "extra" ingredients on hand to make a throw-together meal without too much difficulty.  Sometimes this easier dish might be from later in the month.  Not a problem...just switch it out.  Make a note on the monthly calendar of it and it all works out.

3) Always have an easy meal, that is shelf-stable, in the pantry for days such as this.  I almost always have tuna packets in the house and in a pinch I have no problems mixing up tuna salad and we have sandwiches.  Then if I use those packets, I add them to the shopping list for the next trip to the store so I can restock that easy meal.


Reading back over this, it looks quite daunting at first.  I admit, the initial set up is a bit time consuming.  But the original list of 30+ meals I created while the kids were doing a youth activity at church and I had a few minutes to sit and chill.  And really, in the end, once you get the initial set up complete the rest is pretty easy to keep up. 

Now, time to finish up school for the day so we can get the rest of our chores done and make some etouffee!  ;)

Happy planning!

Amanda

Getting a New Schoolroom....

So, we're finally getting the basement finished.  It's been 3 1/2 l-o-n-g years, 2 contractors, almost twice the money planned for, buckets of tears, and many months of tension to get us to this point....but it's here.  We're moving things downstairs this weekend.  We've been without a school room since before Alivia was born...our old school room started out as being her bedroom until she decided at 6 months old that she didn't like her room and needed to sleep with us.  (Of course, how could she like her room?  It was filled with boxes of papers and books, a very large bookshelf, and a desk with a computer on it...I never got to make the room up for her because the room was still crammed with all of our school stuff!  A vicious cycle for sure...)  Right now, that "old school room" is home to the same boxes, bookshelf, desk and computer, but also my oldest and his cot.  He decided several months ago he needed his own room and his own space and would be happy to sleep on a cot to get that.  So we rearranged a bit and got him his own little space where the cot fits in that room.  (This room will be his own room when things get downstairs, but for now he's sharing it with all the other old school stuff.)

We finally have the basement mostly finished (aside from a bit of trim, a built-in bookshelf, a stair rail, and a cabinet in the bathroom), but the schoolroom is to the point that I can move things down there and start setting up shop.  Now comes the hard part:  organizing.  I have so many ideas and thoughts on how to do it and what I need to purchase and my mind is just spinning with all that has to be done when I start unpacking all those boxes of curriculum and supplies!  Terry will get the big stuff moved around for me and get our school desks brought back over from storage, but I have so much to still do when that all gets here.

So I wonder, what are your favorite items in your homeschool room that you are happy you spent the money to purchase?  Is there an item or a couple of items that you can't do without?  Is there something you didn't buy that you wish you had?  I figure this is my shot to have my room set up the way I want it so I want to make sure I have thought it through.

But, in the end, I have learned a few lessons from this last 3+ years and I wanted to share some of them with you.

1 -- I am a much more patient person than I (or anyone else!) thought I was!

So many times through this process, I've felt like a 2nd thought or an after thought.  I've been quite frustrated and sadly, I've vented my frustrations to a few people when perhaps I shouldn't have. Thankfully, I have vented to friends who were trustworthy and sympathized with me, but also encouraged me as well.  At one point, during this pity party I was having, my sister asked me, "What would you do if Terry came home and said that something happened and you'd not be able to get the basement done for at least 10 years?"  That really made me stop and think about how *I* was handling myself and how much patience I was offering my husband.  This was no picnic for him either...after all, he is the one who ends up with a then-2-year-old's feet in his back every night because she slept crossways in the bed!  God was offering me an opportunity to increase my patience and it was up to me to grasp that opportunity.

2 -- I am actually pretty good at this submission stuff!

Terry will laugh at me if he ever reads that (which isn't likely!) because he is always telling people I'm the boss in the family and that I wear the pants in our relationship.  But we both know that I only make most of the decisions in our family life because he isn't able to from a but-I'm-always-at-work standpoint.  I decide on things that need immediate decisions.  However, when it comes down to it, I defer back to him.  Always.  If he says "no" (flat out) to something, I obey.  {Yes, girls, I did say the word OBEY....look it up, it's in the Bible....we're to obey our husbands!}  If he wants something handled a certain way, I oblige.  Never has that belief or principle been tested more than in this basement project!  Several times throughout the last 2 years of waiting and dealing with a deceptive contractor, I asked Terry if he wanted me to call the guy or step in and deal with the situation.  Every.single.time he said no and said he would handle it.  His way of handling it often consisted of not doing anything for weeks.  I had a few people that said, "You're better than me!  I would have ignored what my husband said and just called the guy (or dealt with it all) myself."  Really!?  How can you do that in good conscience!?  Knowing what the Bible says about marriage and obedience and the wife's place, how can we?  Now, I realize that the Bible is speaking of spiritual matters and I've had several women who say, "Oh, I'll do what he wants me to when it comes to spiritual matters."  But would you really?  If you don't obey and follow his lead on things that aren't spiritual in nature, then why would you on spiritual matters?  And why would your husband think you would?  Why would he even try to lead you on spiritual matters if you buck his authority on everything else?  And really, when it boils down to it, isn't obeying your husband in general a spiritual matter simply because God told us to do it??

So....

February 12, 2014....

Here it is, all these months later and I'm just now coming back to finish this post.  The above portion was written back in August of last year!!  Truthfully, I forgot my password and had to track it down.  HA!  But my mind has been mulling over this whole post and I really wanted to come back and finish it.  We are in the basement and fully out of storage now...we completed the basement and began the process of getting the remaining items out of storage in October.  We finished the storage portion in December and finished the year of 2013 by being all in one location! 

The one last item I think I've learned greatly through this process has been:

#3.  I am a forgiving person, but it takes work.  

I have greatly struggled with the deception of the contractor we had hired.  It's something that I didn't like even having to go through...WHY was God putting us through this?  We only tried to help this person and here was how we were repaid?  But I slowly came to a point that I had to let him go out of my mind and focus on what *I* could learn through it all.  What was God trying to show me?  I think I learned to forgive and to really forgive.  I had to tell myself what I am always telling my children:  I am the only one in control of ME.  I control how I respond and how I react to things.  My not forgiving him, or holding a grudge, would not make it better for anyone within my house.  It wouldn't change him.  It wouldn't make a difference on whether or not he does the same thing to someone else.  He controls himself, I control me.  So, I had to make myself let go of that grudge and that anger so that it wouldn't spoil the good that was happening right within my own home.  I needed to refocus my energies on what I did have control over instead of the areas I didn't.

So in a nutshell...that's where we are.  We are IN our new schoolroom.  We've been using it for a few months and we love it.  There are multiple issues that we deal with (more in a new post!) here in the basement, but the kids and I love having our school area separated from the rest of the house.

End of August!?

{I have no idea what the deal is with Blogger.  It is getting to where it doesn't want to work anymore.    At least now I can insert pictures, but I can't use my signature that I love so much.  :(  }

This picture is one we took last Christmas when doing family pictures with my family.  We each took turns getting some shots of our kids and our families and the grandparents with the kids, etc.  Fun times.  I'm so thankful I had/have a camera that enabled us to get this done so well.  But while my family was "posing" my nephew was snapping the pics.  When I was going through them, I came across this one that he snapped when we were apparently being goofy.  Shocker, eh?  Although you can't see PadaThree's face in this shot, it's still just a perfect shot of our family and is my favorite of all the ones we took.

We're nearing the end of our 3rd week of school and so far things are going well.  PadaTwo is still putting massive pressures on himself, but so far this year he seems to be doing very well with the rather rigorous school schedule I've set for him.  He's managing and for that I'm thankful.  PadaOne is rocking his school, naturally.  And PadaThree is fumbling through dealing with the times that she can't get her way with her bubbies.  I'm grateful for the schedule we seem to be keeping.  It has helped me tremendously to have a schedule again.  I'm not being a nazi about it, but I'm trying to keep them on task to get their work done each day.  Sometimes we start at 9:30 and some days (like today!) we don't start until 11.

We begin moving things down to the basement this weekend and I'm thankful and fearful.  Now comes the hard work for me:  organizing it all!  Not only do we have to clean out and go through all the items in storage, but now I have to find a new home for everything.  I know how we are...we'll get it all in the basement and we'll start using stuff before it's all set up and we'll work out of boxes for a while and stuff will never get fully unpacked/put away.  I sincerely do NOT want to do that this time and desperately want to get it all organized before I let the kids move down there for school.  SO thankful mom is coming to help with this portion of it!  Hopefully before too long I can start using all those things on Pinterest I've been pinning for my homeschool room.  And also hopefully I can post pictures of my own to share what my new basement/school room looks like!  Woot!

I cannot believe that August is over already.  This weekend is Labor Day weekend and we jump into September with both feet.  Crazy.  Fall is here....and our schedule is just as crazy as ever!  Bring it!

Summer is gone!

Summer is officially over, which means school is back in session.  I could.not.be.more.relieved!  Our summer has been extremely crazy and busy and we're just exhausted.  Now, we're turning our sites to the fall and our fall schedule, which is already starting to look equally crazy, and we're looking at making some tough decisions regarding what we take part in and what we skip.  I'm so happy to be back to a schedule for our days so that we all know what to expect and everything gets done like it's supposed to.  

Brent is starting 7th grade this year...and he's already jumping in with both feet.  Clayton is still finishing up 2nd grade stuff from last year.  Sure he's behind, according the Public School standards, but thankfully I don't have to worry about that yet.  I know he will catch up!  The cool thing this year is that already he's starting off with such a great attitude and he's doing GREAT!  He is reading so much better and actually *comprehending* what he's reading.  He still has to do things in small snippets, but he's doing it and that's what matters!  Alivia has decided she needs to do school as well this year, so I have purchased the Rod & Staff Preschool set for her.  So far, she is loving it.  Does a couple pages every other day or so.  I'm also making some activities for her that I got off Pinterest (love my Pinning!) that I hope will occupy her while the boys are both doing independent work.  

I've rearranged our schedule this year a bit too....the boys will have work that they will both do at the same time and I will work with Alivia while they do.  Then, when I need to work individually with one boy or the other, I have them occupying her in another room.  It's working okay....not perfect yet.  But we're only in the second week of school!  

We are still upstairs working in the kitchen for school.  It's not my ideal setup, but we'll manage till the basement is finished.  Hopefully we're only a few weeks from officially starting school downstairs.  Hopefully.  

Time to get back to the madness!

My baby is turning 3!!

The day she left the hospital...MAD because we put clothes on her. 

She *still* goes to sleep this way.  Oh.my.goodness. How adorable!

 3 years ago....it seems so long ago, but also such a short time.  This bundle of joy...the smallest of my three...arrived and brought with her a whirlwind of emotions and circumstances.  Daily I am amazed by her and what she's teaching me, even at her young age of 3. 

Just a few months old at the Pumpkin Patch.

First pumpkin carving!

Happy times...look at how little my babies are!  They have grown and changed so much!

Thanksgiving...

Alivia learned to walk so early (9 months...earlier than B or C) and that was *such* a blessing!  So many people told me to "not wish for her to walk because I would regret it" and they were so wrong!  The poor child was so attached to her Mommy that if I walked into another room she would cry and cry and cry like I had abandoned her and it was so emotionally stressful on both of us, that I was grateful when she started walking.  She still cried when I left the room, but she quickly learned that she could follow me and keep up with me.

Outdoor fun...riding a bike...time with the boys.

 Ah...Daddy.  The person she has neatly wrapped around her little finger.  :-D  He calls her "Princess Cupcake" and will do just about anything for her.  There's nothing like the relationship they have.

Almost 2. 

*sigh*  Just so beautiful!

I am amazed at the beauty she has, already at this age of 2, both inside and out.  She is polite and emotional and friendly (to women, anyway!) and fully of energy and smiles.  My heart about explodes when I catch her in a moment of being still and contemplative...her beauty takes my breath away.  I thank God for her every day of my life.

"Mom, it's hot!"

One of the very rare moments when she let me put her hair up and she actually kept it up!  

Playing with the Photobooth settings on the iPad.  She loves to make silly faces.

 She's silly....she's beautiful...she's full of life and energy...she's my girl.  And she's 3!  Happy Birthday, my Munchkin!!!  I can't wait to see what you do with this world and what God has in store for you!

Is school out yet??

 

We went on a field trip a couple weeks ago to visit a local farm operation.  While interesting, I didn't really learn anything crazy new compared to what we already knew.  Except one thing:  people who sell their own "organic" stuff are REALLY proud of it.  I've seen it other times, but was *floored* by the prices of the items they had to sell...eggs ($3.50/dozen), pork chops (2/pack @ $5.00/lb), and ground beef ($6.75/lb).  I realize that it's popular (and important!) for people to eat and organic and minus all the nasties in our food.  But goodness gracious.  It sounds almost crazy that people actually PAY those prices....how do they buy anything else???  :(

We are nearing the end of our "school year" but we're still not done.  It's weird...I don't feel like we're ever "done" with school.  There is always another portion to learn.  Something else we could have covered better.  Another avenue we could have taken to learn something different.  But, we need a break.  We need to stop for a few weeks and let our brains rest.  The basement is nearing completion (one of these days it WILL be finished) and I just keep hoping that when I finally get it organized and we can go down there and shut the rest of the world out, we'll be able to get more accomplished.  I truly pray that is true.  I want to be able to do our science experiments and know we can leave them where they are and not have to clean the table to eat supper.  (KUDOS to anyone out there who intentionally schools at their table, as opposed to desks.  I don't know how you do it without going bananas!)

One thing that will happen this summer is camp.  The boys have chosen to go to a new camp this year where a majority of their friends from church also go.  Then the week after that, Brent wants to go back to LECYC.  They both love camp and are so anxious to go and learn and spend time with friends.  Summer (Christian) camp is one of the best things we've ever started for the kids and I'm so thankful we've been able to do it!

My New Passion

So, as of yet, I've had no one indicate they are following.  That's okay.  At this point, I just want to write.  And share what's inside of "me."

In the last few years, I've become more and more interested in Essential Oils.  A good friend introduced me to them and sent me a blend she created to help Clayton through some of his anxiety attacks.  Since that time, I've purchased things like Lavender, Tea Tree Oil, Clove oil, Lemongrass, Coconut Oil, Sweet Almond Oil, and little vials to put my blends in.  When Alivia was a newborn and I needed baby Vicks for her, I used the store-bought brand.  She *hated* it! Cried!  When I would put Lavender in her bathwater, she would scream.  Same thing when we used the Lavender lotion after her bath.  So we discovered that she was insensitive to the Lavender...thus, I couldn't use the store-bought version of baby Vicks.  So I had to come up with my own...I used coconut oil and eucalyptus oil and put it in a little container.  Worked very well!

Now, several years have passed.  I have used Tea Tree Oil (TTO) on my pimples and it really makes a difference in their severity.  We've also used an oil from Young Living called Thieves...a moderately expensive oil blend, but it works! {Interestingly, there is a recipe to create this using other oils!}  Clayton always gets "barky" when he gets remotely sick (even something as simple as allergies) and I can put the Thieves on his chest (about 4 drops) and it calms his breathing.  A-Mazing!

Well, this same friend from above has recently introduced me to doTERRA International...  The thing that got me most about these oils is they are certified to be safe to take internally!!  I signed up, got my kit and have been messing around with it all week.  I hope to be able to post my progress here and toss examples out there for anyone wanting to know.

Another thing I'm VERY interested in...kinda goes hand-in-hand with EO's...is making my own hand lotion and hand soap.  I've been doing some research on purchasing beeswax (suggestions on where to buy a good quality product??) and I hope to start that over the summer.  I have seen some great recipes for using EO's to make scented gels (think of those Renuzit cones, only these would be in small jars) and also for making candles.  The possibilities are endless!

Reviving my inner-writer

I've been wanting to get back into writing and blogging and I see so much potential that can be had from writing.  I like the idea of writing to share with family what is happening with my kids and house and life, but I also have begun to see writing as a way to get my thoughts out.  I have thoughts that I'd like to share with people...some of them may not be politically correct.  Some of them might make you mad.  But I figure I can share my thoughts and share my views and maybe by doing that I will give people a glimpse into the real me.

I read books and write reviews.  I love it.  But I find myself wanting to do more with my time.  I am finding that I'm lacking in something...there is something missing.  So I am hoping that by posting and sharing my thoughts and views on things I can find my purpose and figure out where I can excel and what I need to let go.

And so it begins....Let's see where we go and who will join me on this journey.

Science Experiments!

I often review books for Luxury Reading. Recently, I reviewed Time for Kids Big Book of Science Experiments ...a book all about science experiments for kids of many different ages. The book was surprisingly good! Most times when I see books like that, the items needed for the experiments will cost me more than the book itself. This book, however, was full of several experiments that I could do with just the items we had on hand. I think this one below was our favorite!

We got to microwave bars of soap! Strange, yes, but quite surprising what the results were. We predicted at first that the soap would melt and get all over the microwave. Since this is a relatively new microwave (after something else got melted in it a few months back!) I was a bit leery...but the other experiments in the book that we had done thus far worked just the way the book said they would, so I tried not be nervous on this one. HA!

Each bar took less than a minute to transform into what you see below. The white one is Ivory...what is called for in the experiment. We decided to try out another brand to see if they both did the same thing...our standard brand is Irish Spring.

(Please don't fill my comments with how they shouldn't be standing that close to the microwave!)

This one decided to sprout legs...and arms.

...and growing some more...

We call the Irish Spring one our "frog" because of the legs it sprouted. Crazy!

I have to be honest...I don't remember completely (at all) what the reasoning is for why the soap does what it does...or why one brand resulted in such a different "blob." Our favorite, though, was the Irish Spring...simply because it made a shape we could identify. :-D The really cool part of it all was that the soap bars held the shape that they formed in the microwave. AND, after they cooled a bit (they were quite hot when we pulled them out!), we could take a piece of the soap and still *use* it as soap! The microwaves didn't change its usefulness at all. Pretty nifty!

There were other experiments...cleaning pennies with vinegar, making boats of aluminum foil (different shapes) and seeing how many pennies it took to sink the different shaped boats, staining a cloth to test out which items in the house are the best stain removers, etc. Really fun stuff...and again, VERY easy! And how great for me that I got to count 6 or 7 credits of science that day!!!

I've missed you....

It's been several months since I've done any blogging, and even then it wasn't the blogging I was wanting to do. I enjoy writing and I enjoy sharing my daily life and kids with family. But, life takes over and the blogging got pushed out! :( I've decided that I'm going to try to blog more often...even if it's just a written one that doesn't include photos. (I kept waiting for a time when I had the time to upload the pics, and that time never came, so I never did anything!) I do have a couple that I'm uploading right now....hopefully it won't take forever! My goal is to restart the blogging aspect of my life as a creative/writing outlet for myself. Something for me. We'll see where it goes...

Lately we've been just trying to get through the day-to-day life. School and housework, what I can do of it, just takes the whole day. Keeping the kids from fighting (normally the oldest and youngest, oddly enough!) takes about 1/4 of the day, school takes 1/2, and the house stuff takes 1/2....Oh, wait, I'm a 1/4 of a day over! HA!

Recently, a very kind lady from church gave me a bag of clothes that her granddaughter can't wear anymore (for Alivia) and the night I went through them, these are the items A picked out. She wanted them put on immediately, and then paraded around the house in them. :) How could I not take a picture!? Crocs, a ruffly skirt, and a fuzzy winter hat...Precious! The only thing here that we already owned was the shirt. :D

Several weeks ago, we made a radar for science (LOVE Apologia Press!!!) and I was taking taking pictures of the process. The camera can't be out (or the phone camera) without her saying, "Cheese!" and then immediately it's, "Baby...Baby"....she's wanting to see the baby picture. :)

One afternoon, I was helping one of the boys with their schoolwork and she kept coming to me and saying, "Night night" and pointing to my shoulder, wanting to lay her head down. I couldn't stop at that moment and told her to go lay on the couch and I would be with her in a few minutes. Well, the math work ended up taking longer than I expected and when I walked into the living room this (below) is what I found. She *never* goes to sleep on her own. E.V.E.R. (And she hasn't done it again since!)

Last week, I decided to make breakfast. This may not seem out of the norm for most moms, but it is for me. I don't make breakfast or lunch at this point. The boys know how to make a few things so they typically do their own thing for both meals. But this particular morning, I was wanting to try something new with biscuits. I had seen something on Pinterest (LOVE that site!) where someone made cookie cups by baking the cookies on the bottom side of the muffin pan. Combine that with a meal I had over a year ago at Bob Evans that was called a Biscuit Bowl (a bowl sized biscuit filled with eggs, ham, fried potatoes, onions, etc...topped with a hollendaise sauce!! YUM!) and I had an inspiration. Clayton decided to take pictures of the process and Alivia had to get her chair up to the counter to help. :-)

They didn't turn out too bad....but need some work before I'm satisfied. But it was fun, regardless. I still want to try the cookie cups though....

Time to go. Time to figure out what we're having for dinner and get it made before T gets home!

Another new year...

It's amazing how things just sneak up on you...an upcoming event, a birthday, the new school year. We're still finishing things up from last year and all of a sudden I'm having to think about this upcoming year...and I'm panicking a bit. LOL Things aren't finished with the basement and I'm really feeling horribly disorganized.

In the next few days I hope to clean off my desk (which has "gone to Alaska" in the last year!), get a daily schedule back in order, order curriculum and get it here and organized, and begin school. My ultimate goal is to have all of that accomplished by Labor Day weekend...but I'm wondering now if that will happen. However, even if it doesn't, I will just have to deal with that, huh? LOL

Another thing that has snuck up on me....Clayton will turn 9 in just a few short weeks! NINE! My babies are growing!

Before we know it, Thanksgiving and Christmas will be here... But I'll think about that tomorrow!

No Matter Your Age...

Recently I've been doing couponing...and let me tell you with 3 kids in tow, I get quite a few odd looks! Here we are with 2 shopping carts...the boys with Alivia in one, along with all the purses, diaper bags, etc, and me with the other one with my binder sitting up in the "child" area. We try to stay out of the way of other shoppers and stay *relatively* quiet... :-D Sometimes, we get nasty comments, but not all that often.

Yesterday, while in Schnucks, this older couple was shopping as well...we had passed them a couple of times in different aisles. They walked up behind us and said, "Let me guess...19 months apart and then 5 years." It took me a moment to realize they were talking about the spread of the kids' ages...I told them that the boys were 17 months apart, and then there was 7 and 9 years between them and Alivia. They were close in their guess...found out, after standing there talking to them for a bit, that they had children that are 19 months and then 4 years apart...very similar to mine. Then they continue on and tell me, "Yes, our oldest is 65." (!!!!! Emphasis mine!!!!!) Um, okay...I quickly did the math...even if they started at about 18, that would make them over 80. This delightful couple did NOT look a day over 65 themselves!! They were walking through the store commenting about the price of things, figuring out what to buy, which coupons to use (YES, they were couponing too!), and bantering back and forth like they were youngsters.

We swapped stories of couponing, the price of items, and such...and things about shopping with or without children (HA!). It was really quite fun! But what got me the most was how young they acted. They didn't complain about all these "young people" or how hard it was for them to get around (because clearly, they were both doing quite well in the physical department!) and were full of smiles and kind comments to a tired Mama with 3 kids in tow. It was truly refreshing to visit with a couple (randomly) that was upbeat and smiling, rather than complaining and grumpy!

It was a great reminder that no matter how bad we feel, or how old we are, we can offer a smile to someone else. No matter our age, we can chat with some random person in a store. No matter our age, we can swap stories with someone of a different generation.

I'm learning lately that older people sometimes feel dismissed...they feel that kids of today (and we're ALL considered "kids" to them!) ignore them, don't notice them, or just want to hurry past them to get to the next new item on the hot list for that day. I could have just smiled politely to that couple and lightly acknowledged their presence, but then gone back to my stressful and exhausting task of shopping and getting good deals. However, that's not me. I don't do that (intentionally, anyway!) and I didn't want to do that with them... I also realize that it's not all the "fault" of the youngsters of today...there are some "older" people that just like to complain. Plain and simple. They are hurting (physically? emotionally? spiritually?) and because of this hurt, they get grumpy with the people they see, they don't want to get up and go shopping or go run errands, they want to be left alone but not so alone that they get lonely. There is a delicate balance that needs to take place. We need to teach our children to acknowledge and learn from these older generations...they are passing away so quickly, it seems, that we're losing a great deal of their wisdom and knowledge. But we also need to help these older generations feel young again! We need to spend more time around them to help them feel young, help them smile again, and help them remember what it's like to raise children and try to shop with them! (I'd love any ideas on how to work on this little project....)

I'm so thankful I didn't dismiss them! It was a pleasant conversation and really added to my day! I only regret that I didn't get their names...how nice it would have been to possibly keep in contact.
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***I realize I haven't posted on here in a LONG time...I hope to remedy that soon. I'm really wanting to get things blogged more often...which will likely mean less Facebook time! LOL

Love Finds You in Tombstone, Arizona

Love Finds You in Tombstone, Arizona

By Miralee Ferrell

Christy Grey (first seen in Last Chance, CA) used to be a dancehall girl, but has changed her life and had a new start in California. She has vowed never to go back to that life again. But when she receives a telegram stating that her mother is very ill, Christy leaves California and heads home to care for her mother. However, on the way the Christy is injured during a stagecoach robbery that leaves her with no money. When she arrives in Tombstone, Christy finds her brother at a gambling hall and her mother gravely ill in a shack of a home. Christy tries to look for work, but her brother’s reputation precedes her and hinders her progress. Finally Christy is forced to work in the gambling hall, but not as a “working girl.”

Nevada is a gun-fighter who is on the run. Unknowingly, he gets himself tied to the stagecoach robbers and ends up meeting Christy. Forced by a desire to help her, Nevada tracks Christy down in Tombstone. Along the way, Nevada feels the need to help one of the saloon girls leave that way of life. But soon his past catches up with him and Nevada finds himself searching for a brighter future…with God and with Christy.

The history and the research that went into this book is truly fascinating! The events that take place in the book are very similar to those that took place in real life in Tombstone in the late 1800’s. Miralee tells a wonderful story of love, acceptance, forgiveness, and resolution. We meet several new characters throughout this book that I, personally, would love to see in future stories!

While finding their way back to God, Christy and Nevada find their way to each other!

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I once again had the privilege of reading and reviewing this book for Miralee. I've read every book of hers so far and have never been disappointed, but I think this is my favorite so far! Thanks to Miralee for the chance to read and review!